Bill Snyder looks to be proving his worth again. K-State has scored 2 touchdowns to Miami's lone field goal early in the second quarter. He's made Klein the centerpiece of the offense, running the boy around the ends and having him pass all over the field; he's 7 of 9 for 100 yards. Snyder suggested that K-State had only opened 25% of his playbook to-date, and apparently he wasn't lying.
Last year we saw Snyder pulling similar antics at Texas, starting Klein after throwing QB Carson Coffman started all year prior. Klein only completed 4 passes, but we fondly remember the beating the Wildcats put on the Longhorns in 2010 due to Collin's amazing running day. I didn't hate Ron Prince, but Snyder is proving why we named the stadium after him.
In Canada for PopMontreal. Leaving the hotel for bangin' music party. Hopefully we can extrapolate this score for about a 48-12 win. Fingers crossed?
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Monday, September 19, 2011
Why Kansas >>>>> New York
A couple weeks ago, the following offshoot of conversation transpired on the Facebook:
Dave Toan October 8. Mark the Date.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 2 people
Kathleen Digan no thats my birthday. you cant do this on my birthday.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 1 person
Dave Toan OMG - I wondered why my idea was so perfect!
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like
Kathleen Digan not to be selfish...you are all clearly invited to stout on my birthday at stout that evening to see me drink the birthday jug.
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like · 1 person
Dave Toan Watching Nora hit 'like' is kinda creepy
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like
Dave Toan and you're invited to 'aroudn the world' after you finish your birthday jug at Stout.
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like
Kathleen Digan shut up you all know you need my organizational skills to plan it...i planned both the prom and the ball at my high school.
September 7 at 3:11pm · Like
Dave Toan Not having attended a school with a ball, I'm immediately skeptical of anyone who planned one. I once hosted a dorm-wide ping pong tournament, so, pretty much, suck it.
September 7 at 3:12pm · Like
Kathleen Digan im gonna come over to 18 and fight you dave. im wearing pearls and heels today, both of which i will use as weapons. be ready.
September 7 at 3:13pm · Like
Kathleen Digan (sarcasm font would be lovely to have for this thread)
September 7 at 3:15pm · Like
Dave Toan "Quick, Brendan James Boyle, call security - a minority is trying to infiltrate our corridors!"
September 7 at 3:17pm · Like
Kathleen Digan the sgt at arms love me dave. they will totes take my side over yours
September 7 at 3:18pm · Like
Dave Toan Maybe, but high school grammar teachers the world over hate you right now.
September 7 at 3:19pm · Like
Kathleen Digan oh wow i didn't know they taught grammar in kansas dave!
September 7 at 3:20pm · Like
Dave Toan http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/states/uschartsat.html - If you scroll down to 'k' (that's the letter after 'j'), you'll find Kansas sitting at #4. But y'all tried hard too, I'm sure. SAT and ACT Average Scores by States law2.umkc.eduRanksings of states by SAT and ACT average scores.
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like ·
Kathleen Digan hey look its the grammar cowboy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_-o1P2WTKUKNOW-TV - The Grammar Cowboy
www.youtube.com
1991 - A University of Houston student edutainment project. "The Grammar Cowboy...
See More
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like
Nora Elizabeth dont you two have jobs?
September 7 at 3:30pm · Like · 1 person
Kathleen Digan Also nora, dave and I were taking part in important bi partisan bonding. This is your govt at work.
September 7 at 3:55pm · Like
Dave Toan ditto
September 7 at 4:00pm · Like
So then I started typing this: KS v. NY
I originally set out to prove how much greater Kansas was than New York using SAT scores, which are indicative of intelligence, which is indicative of likelihood to commit crime. But apparently KS has much greater crime rates than NY, so, fail.
Dave Toan October 8. Mark the Date.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 2 people
Kathleen Digan no thats my birthday. you cant do this on my birthday.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 1 person
Dave Toan OMG - I wondered why my idea was so perfect!
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like
Kathleen Digan not to be selfish...you are all clearly invited to stout on my birthday at stout that evening to see me drink the birthday jug.
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like · 1 person
Dave Toan Watching Nora hit 'like' is kinda creepy
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like
Dave Toan and you're invited to 'aroudn the world' after you finish your birthday jug at Stout.
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like
Kathleen Digan shut up you all know you need my organizational skills to plan it...i planned both the prom and the ball at my high school.
September 7 at 3:11pm · Like
Dave Toan Not having attended a school with a ball, I'm immediately skeptical of anyone who planned one. I once hosted a dorm-wide ping pong tournament, so, pretty much, suck it.
September 7 at 3:12pm · Like
Kathleen Digan im gonna come over to 18 and fight you dave. im wearing pearls and heels today, both of which i will use as weapons. be ready.
September 7 at 3:13pm · Like
Kathleen Digan (sarcasm font would be lovely to have for this thread)
September 7 at 3:15pm · Like
Dave Toan "Quick, Brendan James Boyle, call security - a minority is trying to infiltrate our corridors!"
September 7 at 3:17pm · Like
Kathleen Digan the sgt at arms love me dave. they will totes take my side over yours
September 7 at 3:18pm · Like
Dave Toan Maybe, but high school grammar teachers the world over hate you right now.
September 7 at 3:19pm · Like
Kathleen Digan oh wow i didn't know they taught grammar in kansas dave!
September 7 at 3:20pm · Like
Dave Toan http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/states/uschartsat.html - If you scroll down to 'k' (that's the letter after 'j'), you'll find Kansas sitting at #4. But y'all tried hard too, I'm sure. SAT and ACT Average Scores by States law2.umkc.eduRanksings of states by SAT and ACT average scores.
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like ·
Kathleen Digan hey look its the grammar cowboy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_-o1P2WTKUKNOW-TV - The Grammar Cowboy
www.youtube.com
1991 - A University of Houston student edutainment project. "The Grammar Cowboy...
See More
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like
Nora Elizabeth dont you two have jobs?
September 7 at 3:30pm · Like · 1 person
Kathleen Digan Also nora, dave and I were taking part in important bi partisan bonding. This is your govt at work.
September 7 at 3:55pm · Like
Dave Toan ditto
September 7 at 4:00pm · Like
So then I started typing this: KS v. NY
I originally set out to prove how much greater Kansas was than New York using SAT scores, which are indicative of intelligence, which is indicative of likelihood to commit crime. But apparently KS has much greater crime rates than NY, so, fail.
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Cage Jousting
I haven't been making any entries recently, which is attributable to nothing but laziness. I have more downtime both at work and in the evenings than ever before. I still don't feel like writing. Rather, I will be periodically transferring old entries on Facebook onto this medium; taking credit twice for something I wrote once. During a conversation with Jason, Thunderdome was referenced. It reminded me of this little diddy from my senior year of college. Enjoy:
In April we were sitting in Game Theory and learning about bidding. Apparently there is no good way to assign payoffs to two bidders who tie for the highest bid, so each person has their payoffs divided by two in mathematical solutions. I find this unacceptable. I first suggested Cage Match to determine winner, and then decided that jousting would be a better method. Five minutes later, I stumbled upon the most baller way ever to determine who wins: cage jousting. I then spent the day's lecture writing rules for game. The scenario we were discussing was bidding for tulips. Earlier today I found the notebook I recorded the rules in, and need to electronically record them before the notes go into a burn pile:
Rules for Cage Jousting
1. Two men enter, 1 exits.
2. Horses are not considered men.
3. Two horses enter.
4. 2, 1, or none horses exit.
5. Men must remain on horses: floor fighting off-limits.
6. It's not fair to knock another man's horse off-balance to get him on the ground.
7. If another man is aiming at your horse, he is not aiming for you. Hence, you have a free shot. If you cannot succeed in knocking him off, you suck.
8. If joust ends in tie, winning horse receives tulip.
9. .95 chance if you aim at horse, horse will eat you.
10. This .95 chance being eaten, combined with danger of leaving yourself open, makes aiming at horse very stupid.
11. Only Chuck Norris would aim at horse.
12. Chuck Norris does not lose cage joust.
13. This is strictly hypothetical - Chuck Norris would never bid for tulips.
In April we were sitting in Game Theory and learning about bidding. Apparently there is no good way to assign payoffs to two bidders who tie for the highest bid, so each person has their payoffs divided by two in mathematical solutions. I find this unacceptable. I first suggested Cage Match to determine winner, and then decided that jousting would be a better method. Five minutes later, I stumbled upon the most baller way ever to determine who wins: cage jousting. I then spent the day's lecture writing rules for game. The scenario we were discussing was bidding for tulips. Earlier today I found the notebook I recorded the rules in, and need to electronically record them before the notes go into a burn pile:
Rules for Cage Jousting
1. Two men enter, 1 exits.
2. Horses are not considered men.
3. Two horses enter.
4. 2, 1, or none horses exit.
5. Men must remain on horses: floor fighting off-limits.
6. It's not fair to knock another man's horse off-balance to get him on the ground.
7. If another man is aiming at your horse, he is not aiming for you. Hence, you have a free shot. If you cannot succeed in knocking him off, you suck.
8. If joust ends in tie, winning horse receives tulip.
9. .95 chance if you aim at horse, horse will eat you.
10. This .95 chance being eaten, combined with danger of leaving yourself open, makes aiming at horse very stupid.
11. Only Chuck Norris would aim at horse.
12. Chuck Norris does not lose cage joust.
13. This is strictly hypothetical - Chuck Norris would never bid for tulips.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Solutions for Americans, for America
This weekend I learned about the cottage industry of ‘day’ and ‘sleep away’ camp. For those of you growing up in real America and requiring a quick primer, ‘day camp’ is where you send children for the day, then pick them up in the evening. ‘Sleep away camp,’ however, entails actually going somewhere else and sleeping overnight. Both industries (if they can be bifurcated) are apparently built around the premise that rich parents need something to do with their kids during the summer.
I think I can do some good for this country by blowing up this entire structure. Back in real America, if you’re 12 and it’s summer, you find your ass a job. There’s no excuse for being in junior high and not knowing how to at least operate a grain cart. So we take all these privileged children, and put them to work picking strawberries and melons in fields across the country. We would boost the economy and help Long Island be a little less of a joke in the process.
The economic boost would be immediate. Picking jobs are available, Americans just aren’t willing to do them – which is why we have to import our labor. These children would be taking jobs from migrant workers that typically send a large portion of their wages back home through remittances. Instead of that money going to Mexico and the Dominican Republic, it stays here to be spent on Ralph Lauren shirts that, though manufactured in Vietnam, are sold in American malls.
The bigger benefit, however, is that Long Island gets its shit in order. The place is seriously an embarrassment. The kids it produces need to learn what it’s like to work for something. Floating this idea over the weekend, I was told the kids would just refuse to work. Good. Then they don’t eat. Maybe they’ll starve. One more problem solved. Bitter end.
I think I can do some good for this country by blowing up this entire structure. Back in real America, if you’re 12 and it’s summer, you find your ass a job. There’s no excuse for being in junior high and not knowing how to at least operate a grain cart. So we take all these privileged children, and put them to work picking strawberries and melons in fields across the country. We would boost the economy and help Long Island be a little less of a joke in the process.
The economic boost would be immediate. Picking jobs are available, Americans just aren’t willing to do them – which is why we have to import our labor. These children would be taking jobs from migrant workers that typically send a large portion of their wages back home through remittances. Instead of that money going to Mexico and the Dominican Republic, it stays here to be spent on Ralph Lauren shirts that, though manufactured in Vietnam, are sold in American malls.
The bigger benefit, however, is that Long Island gets its shit in order. The place is seriously an embarrassment. The kids it produces need to learn what it’s like to work for something. Floating this idea over the weekend, I was told the kids would just refuse to work. Good. Then they don’t eat. Maybe they’ll starve. One more problem solved. Bitter end.
Friday, August 5, 2011
(How To) Teach the Controversy
If I were a biology teacher in Louisiana, Texas, Kansas, et cetera and asked to teach creationism, I would reply that I am a science teacher. Given my loathe for science, I don’t see how this would ever be a scenario, but that would still be my reply. If the response was that I was expected to ‘teach the controversy,’ I would accept the demand without any argument.
At some point in the year we would have a class based on psychology and people’s mental needs. We would cover the urge to explain things regardless of tangible evidence supporting the explanations, with supernatural beings traditionally held responsible for most events that societies had no control over. Next we’d hit the fact that likelihood of survival is increased if one is more willing to follow the group, giving rise to the fallacy of the appeal to popularity and resistance to questioning one’s institutions. The final 60 seconds would go: people traditionally turned to religion to explain things, and the Judeo-Christian background of your ancestors used the Adam and Eve story to explain how people came to be. People were afraid to challenge this because society has never treated questioning scientists very well – particularly when the questions challenge the authority of the church. As such, the controversy prevents more serious scientific discussion. Later on, some people figured this’d be a great thing to politicize and develop into a wedge issue. In short, people are closed minded and opposed to whatever the church campaigns against. Republican strategists manipulate this in an effective manner, well aware that in the midst of adversity voters really do cling to their guns and religion. You have now been taught the controversy. Enjoy your weekend kids!
At some point in the year we would have a class based on psychology and people’s mental needs. We would cover the urge to explain things regardless of tangible evidence supporting the explanations, with supernatural beings traditionally held responsible for most events that societies had no control over. Next we’d hit the fact that likelihood of survival is increased if one is more willing to follow the group, giving rise to the fallacy of the appeal to popularity and resistance to questioning one’s institutions. The final 60 seconds would go: people traditionally turned to religion to explain things, and the Judeo-Christian background of your ancestors used the Adam and Eve story to explain how people came to be. People were afraid to challenge this because society has never treated questioning scientists very well – particularly when the questions challenge the authority of the church. As such, the controversy prevents more serious scientific discussion. Later on, some people figured this’d be a great thing to politicize and develop into a wedge issue. In short, people are closed minded and opposed to whatever the church campaigns against. Republican strategists manipulate this in an effective manner, well aware that in the midst of adversity voters really do cling to their guns and religion. You have now been taught the controversy. Enjoy your weekend kids!
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