I Hate Texting

Which is why I'm constantly accused of being awful of answering texts - that's kind of the point. I don't feel like texting you, ergo, you won't be receiving a response. Anyway, the following exchange happened last night:

Mom: At lauras benefit. We have a website design, t shirt, coconut pie, billfold, and movie tickets.

Mom: Is xlarge good for you.

Me: Large or medium.

Mom: You getting and xlarge. Wash it in hot water.


Texting: where poor spelling and grammar meet snark. Also, my parents now have an agreement to have a website developed for them. I'm not sure if they know what that means, but I imagine a return to web 2.0.

New Rule: Emulate Your Villians, or Don't...

For better or worse, I love me some Real Time with Bill Maher. Maher typically ends his show with 4-5 humorous rules making fun of pop culture and ridiculous aspects of society, and then one rule that receives a five minute tangent on how evil the Republican-controlled House is and the necessity of regulating corporations/making drug laws less stupid/clean air. Well, I've a new rule for next Friday's show: You can't support the Occupy Wall Street movement (OWS) as a liberal response to the Tea Party (TP?) movement if you once characterized the TP as a movement based on willful ignorance without acknowledging it makes OWS, by the transitive property, a movement based on willful ignorance.

Van Jones, the AFL-CIO, and other big names have now gone to bat for OWS over the past week, giving it the momentum to last for at least as long as it takes for NYC to get cold and drive the trustafarians back to The Island. We've also observed pundits and liberals jump on the opportunity to compare the movement to 2009's emergence of angry conservatives collectively known as the Teabaggerspartiers.

The irony lies in how those proud of this comparison so derided the Teabaggerspartiers as a collection of ignorant racists two years ago. They were denigrated for their reactionary nature (a characterization I agreed with, which is why I refused to let Brendan Boyle call me a tea partyist during our late night philosophical debates, regardless of my refusal to believe government is capable of consistently providing efficient services). I don't have a favorable opinion of the movement; it's become part platitudes, part multimillion dollar enterprise that allows Herman Cain to sell books and Sarah Palin to make expensive speeches. This is an evolution from when I just assumed it was willful ignorance and platitudes, personally unable to recognize the profit potential that Russo Marsh and Rogers exploited.

The point to all this is highlighting how the Tea Party Movement was once mocked two years ago, still deserves to be mocked, and the fact that former mockers are now desperate to compare OWS with TP as a force to be reckoned with. Maybe the occupation lasts through the winter - good for those actually making the sacrifice to occupy Zuccotti Park. But don't compare yourself to a movement based on willful ignorance - although your tactics may be different, it only exposes you as willfully ignorant.

The Old Dog Has Tricks - He'll Sure Hunt!

Bill Snyder looks to be proving his worth again. K-State has scored 2 touchdowns to Miami's lone field goal early in the second quarter. He's made Klein the centerpiece of the offense, running the boy around the ends and having him pass all over the field; he's 7 of 9 for 100 yards. Snyder suggested that K-State had only opened 25% of his playbook to-date, and apparently he wasn't lying.

Last year we saw Snyder pulling similar antics at Texas, starting Klein after throwing QB Carson Coffman started all year prior. Klein only completed 4 passes, but we fondly remember the beating the Wildcats put on the Longhorns in 2010 due to Collin's amazing running day. I didn't hate Ron Prince, but Snyder is proving why we named the stadium after him.

In Canada for PopMontreal. Leaving the hotel for bangin' music party. Hopefully we can extrapolate this score for about a 48-12 win. Fingers crossed?

Why Kansas >>>>> New York

A couple weeks ago, the following offshoot of conversation transpired on the Facebook:

Dave Toan October 8. Mark the Date.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 2 people

Kathleen Digan no thats my birthday. you cant do this on my birthday.
September 7 at 3:08pm · Like · 1 person

Dave Toan OMG - I wondered why my idea was so perfect!
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like

Kathleen Digan not to be selfish...you are all clearly invited to stout on my birthday at stout that evening to see me drink the birthday jug.
September 7 at 3:09pm · Like · 1 person

Dave Toan Watching Nora hit 'like' is kinda creepy
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like

Dave Toan and you're invited to 'aroudn the world' after you finish your birthday jug at Stout.
September 7 at 3:10pm · Like

Kathleen Digan shut up you all know you need my organizational skills to plan it...i planned both the prom and the ball at my high school.
September 7 at 3:11pm · Like

Dave Toan Not having attended a school with a ball, I'm immediately skeptical of anyone who planned one. I once hosted a dorm-wide ping pong tournament, so, pretty much, suck it.
September 7 at 3:12pm · Like

Kathleen Digan im gonna come over to 18 and fight you dave. im wearing pearls and heels today, both of which i will use as weapons. be ready.
September 7 at 3:13pm · Like

Kathleen Digan ‎(sarcasm font would be lovely to have for this thread)
September 7 at 3:15pm · Like

Dave Toan ‎"Quick, Brendan James Boyle, call security - a minority is trying to infiltrate our corridors!"
September 7 at 3:17pm · Like

Kathleen Digan the sgt at arms love me dave. they will totes take my side over yours
September 7 at 3:18pm · Like

Dave Toan Maybe, but high school grammar teachers the world over hate you right now.
September 7 at 3:19pm · Like

Kathleen Digan oh wow i didn't know they taught grammar in kansas dave!
September 7 at 3:20pm · Like

Dave Toan http://law2.umkc.edu/faculty/projects/ftrials/states/uschartsat.html - If you scroll down to 'k' (that's the letter after 'j'), you'll find Kansas sitting at #4. But y'all tried hard too, I'm sure. SAT and ACT Average Scores by States law2.umkc.eduRanksings of states by SAT and ACT average scores.
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like ·

Kathleen Digan hey look its the grammar cowboy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y_-o1P2WTKUKNOW-TV - The Grammar Cowboy
www.youtube.com
‎1991 - A University of Houston student edutainment project. "The Grammar Cowboy...
See More
September 7 at 3:26pm · Like

Nora Elizabeth dont you two have jobs?
September 7 at 3:30pm · Like · 1 person

Kathleen Digan Also nora, dave and I were taking part in important bi partisan bonding. This is your govt at work.
September 7 at 3:55pm · Like

Dave Toan ditto
September 7 at 4:00pm · Like

So then I started typing this: KS v. NY

I originally set out to prove how much greater Kansas was than New York using SAT scores, which are indicative of intelligence, which is indicative of likelihood to commit crime. But apparently KS has much greater crime rates than NY, so, fail.

Cage Jousting

I haven't been making any entries recently, which is attributable to nothing but laziness. I have more downtime both at work and in the evenings than ever before. I still don't feel like writing. Rather, I will be periodically transferring old entries on Facebook onto this medium; taking credit twice for something I wrote once. During a conversation with Jason, Thunderdome was referenced. It reminded me of this little diddy from my senior year of college. Enjoy:

In April we were sitting in Game Theory and learning about bidding. Apparently there is no good way to assign payoffs to two bidders who tie for the highest bid, so each person has their payoffs divided by two in mathematical solutions. I find this unacceptable. I first suggested Cage Match to determine winner, and then decided that jousting would be a better method. Five minutes later, I stumbled upon the most baller way ever to determine who wins: cage jousting. I then spent the day's lecture writing rules for game. The scenario we were discussing was bidding for tulips. Earlier today I found the notebook I recorded the rules in, and need to electronically record them before the notes go into a burn pile:

Rules for Cage Jousting

1. Two men enter, 1 exits.
2. Horses are not considered men.
3. Two horses enter.
4. 2, 1, or none horses exit.
5. Men must remain on horses: floor fighting off-limits.
6. It's not fair to knock another man's horse off-balance to get him on the ground.
7. If another man is aiming at your horse, he is not aiming for you. Hence, you have a free shot. If you cannot succeed in knocking him off, you suck.
8. If joust ends in tie, winning horse receives tulip.
9. .95 chance if you aim at horse, horse will eat you.
10. This .95 chance being eaten, combined with danger of leaving yourself open, makes aiming at horse very stupid.
11. Only Chuck Norris would aim at horse.
12. Chuck Norris does not lose cage joust.
13. This is strictly hypothetical - Chuck Norris would never bid for tulips.