So I ran the Turning Stone half marathon this morning, and it really reinforced how big of assholes runners are. After the race I watched the finals of a four day billiards tournament, got some chow, and just wandered around watching old people transfer their children's inheritance to some Indian Nation one 50¢ lever pull at a time. By this point I'd changed, sporting a nondescript t-shirt, shorts, and sandals. Yet I kept seeing people walking around with their numbers still safety pinned to their shirts and wearing the medal around their necks (every finisher gets a medal - it's like an elementary school track meet). Good job, you finished, congratulations. But seriously, you look like an asshole wearing that ribbon around your neck. Besides, it's heavy and the ribbon has sharp threads poking out. It can't be comfortable. You're uncomfortable to boot? That makes you an asshole and an idiot. I'm not impressed.
The reason I'm not impressed is because I beat you (get ready for the complaining-to-braggadociousness transition). How do I know I beat you? Because real runners win real hardware.
Now give me some likes.